Marriage is all in the communication

Missouri couples could find themselves heading toward divorce court for one simple reason: a lack of communication. According to studies, that is the top reason for a marital breakup. Nagging also plays a key role. What other communication faux pas could cause a divorce?

• Interruption, which goes together with finishing a partner’s sentence, as well as forgetting to pause while speaking. Women tend to demand answers before men are ready to answer the question, according to studies. Women should stop, count to 30 and then ask one question at a time.
• Being impolite and negative. Send good wishes your partner’s way, especially by remaining positive. Instead of barking at your partner, such as angrily asking why dinner is never ready when you get home, compliment them about how much you enjoyed the meal. Husbands will make a wife’s day by doing so, and vice versa.
• Don’t hide your feelings or say something you don’t mean because it’s the easiest way. By doing so, resentment can enter the relationship in the future. Instead, it’s best to let your spouse know that you want to talk later after you have relaxed a bit. Make sure to have that conversation.
• Don’t roll your eyes or tighten your lips; actions such as that send clues that you might be defensive or such. Instead, maintain eye contact and focus, sending a good non-verbal message.
• Don’t display a negative attitude. Recognize that being argumentative or defensive just will not work. Instead, take time to think through the conversation so that you send good messages instead of negative ones.

By implementing these tools early on in a relationship, a couple can develop a strong communication system from the start, perhaps preventing a divorce later. Nothing is to be gained from following negative relationship patterns.

Source: Your Tango.com, “Divorce Causes: 5 Communication Habits That Lead To Divorce, Deb Dutilh, Nov. 29, 2012